Do you hate when someone says to you after a break-up that should’ve trusted your gut? I don’t know about you but my gut tells me when I need to eat or when I need to defecate. Other than that, my gut doesn’t tell me anything. When you realistically think about what intuition means by definition (n. the ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious understanding) you’ll understand it has nothing to do with your gut, it’s your brain. So why do people say go with your gut? Some might say, well you’re just an asshole for being so literal. But am I? If you drive your car off of a cliff, chances are you’re going to be seriously injured and or killed. You can’t say, oh well my intuition tells me that if I do this then that will happen. That will happen, because that is reality.
Life is either this or that so how can the majority of people who believe in intuition honestly base life decisions or relationships on their intuition at all? The result of things are 50/50 no matter what you or I think. So eventually one might say, “oh I knew that about him/her and knew that was going to happen.” Well of course you did, it could have only turned out one way or the other and it just so happens that this time, you think you believe your intuition to be of some value. But what makes you right err…your intuition? Why does anyone feel the need to give themselves or their intuition credit for life happening?
Perhaps I am so negative towards the subject due to my lack of spirituality or connection with any religion, other than no religion. I am more matter of fact, science kind of guy. Think about decisions in which you’ve based off what you thought was your gut or the gut of another telling you to do something. Did you ever think that what if the situation, just one part of the equation had been different? If perhaps you had said something different, done something different. Even something as simple as “hello,” how things could have played out. I think people spend too much time analyzing these so called gut feelings instead of actually living and seeing how things play out.
I consider myself to be a pretty smart guy. Not just intellectually but also street-smart. That wasn’t acquired from a book, it was a result of living life and listening. I’ve never been a many of many spoken words, unless I trust you with my thoughts, but I’m always listening. My big ears have to be good for something right? Many people would consider the odds of 50/50 to not be that great, however to me those odds are definitely favorable. No one is going to be wrong nine times out of ten. I guess that’s a part of the architect in me. You can’t be an architect if you’re not an optimist, you just can’t.
Just this past week I was listening to a morning radio show on NPR and a listener had called in to the show asking for advice on what she should do in her relationship. Should she stay or should she go. Not one person told her to stick it out with the guy that she had been with for two plus years. While listening to their story for a full three days (I must add that I do not advise anyone to air their relationships dirty laundry to anyone – it’s just not a good idea, ever) I knew the problem was a lack of communication. I don’t think I’m wrong to say that problem exists in the majority of relationships. We have forgot how to talk to one another, but that’s another subject for another day. Like I said, on the third day I knew the issue at hand and I was drawn in for the long haul to see what decision she would make. This morning she revealed that she decided to give the guy an ultimatum last night. Her demand was that he spend more time with her or she would leave the relationship. She admitted that she wasn’t really planning on leaving, she just wanted more time from him. I think there was likely more variables to the story, but this was what she stated the issue stemmed from in the relationship. She went on to tell the audience that she had sat him down and given him the ultimatum and the result wasn’t in her favor. Apparently she learned that the reason he had been working so much over the past two months was because he had earned a promotion at work and if he met a certain productivity level by the end of this month he would win an island getaway. Well, the two of them had never been on a vacation because of financial reasons and she herself had to take care of her mother who died from cancer just recently, so to him this was a way to do something nice for her to make her forget all the negatives and go some place where the two of them could relax, but it was more for her benefit. He had planned to surprise her on their third year anniversary that is only a couple of weeks away. But her giving him the ultimatum led to an argument they didn’t argue fair (something most couples do not know how to do). Instead the arguing was to hurt one another and bring up past mistakes (never a good idea). Well, as of this morning the two of them decided, one more so than the other, that the relationship had turned selfish and the guy decided to move out. All of the callers and all of the people that had responded to her on social media had told her that his lack of interest and presence over the last two months had to be due to him being unfaithful. Why do people listen to others who have no idea, other than the negative view that is portrayed when you air your dirty laundry to others? The truth is, most people look at life as a competition and want you to believe that their life is better than yours. The life that is portrayed on social media is usually not the case behind closed doors. I gave up Facebook around two or so years ago and couldn’t be happier about the decision. Keep your relationship problems to yourselves and work on them together. The thing that made me most feel like the caller was just a dumb ass (for lack of a better term at the moment), was she had said, just as the majority of the callers…that her intuition was telling her that something wasn’t right and that her significant other was cheating. She couldn’t prove it, but her gut told her so …and that had to be right. Wrong.
Look at what it cost her and the relationship that she stated she was previously happy with. I’m sure the two will reconcile but that whole situation happened when it never should have gone that far…What has your intuition done for you lately? Have you ever regretted settling on what you thought was your gut feeling or listening to someone else tell you what to do based on their gut feeling? I know I have.
If we only stopped to think that our next move, thought, or words might change the whole entire scenario. Either way….one of two things are going to happen no matter what you or any other persons feelings are about the matter. Before I end this I want to clarify that I do believe every person has the ability to read a situation or a person and determine how they’re going to respond and that’s the freedom of choice (50/50). That’s not intuition. Intuition doesn’t tell you someone is cheating on you, reality does. There are signs and it all comes down to if you want to know if the person is cheating on you – be observant. So ask yourself, is it intuition or is it reason – logic?